Sasuke's Winter
by DriftingFlower
Summary: Could he maybe melt my snow? I would never know I guess, I’d thrown that away with every other part of my soul that actually had some form of meaning to it. .:Multi-chapter. Tell me what you think. Updates will depend on if anyone reads and reviews this:.
1. Sasuke's Winter

**A/N:** I don't know, this is just a short story that decided to crop up out of nowhere…I actually expect it to have a few more chapters, but all in all, it's really very short.

**Warnings:** It's just about self hate and really all over hopelessness, so it's not happy. Probably violent as well.

**Rating:** Not like M, so I suppose T.

**Disclaimer:** I disclaim ownership.

**oOoOoOo**

It's the snow, it's always the snow, that reminds me of his face. Why is that? I don't even understand it myself, mainly because he's the furthest thing from snow you could possibly find. The cold, and the white emptiness is for me, the part that I resemble. I know that's what he would tell me if he were here..

The crunching beneath my feet is comforting but irritating at the same time. I love snow, and everything about it really, though it would be a cold day in hell when I would admit to loving it, to loving anything really.

But right now, I did not need crunching, I was supposed to be silent. I centered chakra down into my feet, creating heat, so the white fluff would melt with each step instead of indenting. I sighed and stared up into the gray sky, looking at the blackness of the trees fighting the colorless world of winter. So warped and blunt the branches were, so noticeable against that gray. Was that how I had been, when I was there? A black thing jutting out where it didn't belong?

It didn't matter now in any case, I was perfect here. In this silence and cold, I was in my element. Almost halfway away from that wretched place I had once willingly abided at. Would I actually make it? I suppose it could be possible. He hadn't been watching me so close lately, he had grown lazy in his persistence. He assumed. Once someone assumed, it was so easy to betray them; just as my brother had done to me. Just as I had done to my precious person. I snorted softly, glancing around the forest for signs of movement. How easy it was for me to put the same evil onto another person, the evil of being abandoned.

Should he really have expected me to stay, though? I'm too tainted a being, too broken to be of use to anyone…Especially someone like him, the person where warmth seems to start from.

Could he maybe melt my snow? I would never know I guess, I'd thrown that away with every other part of my soul that actually had some form of meaning to it. Almost there now. If I wasn't stopped the next hundred or so yards, he wouldn't come for me.

How terribly simple of him to expect my loyalty.

I shed my clothes as I walked, stripping down to just my pants, leaving that damned symbol of him behind. I kept my shoes, they helped some against the snow. Where had I been going? Maybe it was really nowhere, I had nowhere to go at all. My body shivered, protesting against the sudden bareness to the winters wind. It didn't matter; maybe I would find a tree somewhere to rest under until the ultimate sort of sleep took over me.

My toes were numb now, the snow melting onto them only to be replaced with more as I took each step. One last look behind me to confirm it, and I knew I was clear by now. I sighed and glanced up again, closing my eyes for a moment and just breathing as deeply as I could. Freedom tasted of bitter cold and loneliness, but it was freedom none the less.

The pale skin of my arms was covered in goose bumps, my body slowly going down in temperature as I continued to walk. My cheeks were bitterly cold, and I knew they must be tainted pink as the blood fought to keep a steady flow in my sleepy veins. Why did I feel like I wanted to see him so badly? Maybe that's what happened when you were close to dying, you wished for silly, useless things.

I sat beneath a tree, the bark scratching at my bare back as I slid down to meet the ground. I was there no longer than a few moments when I could see the snow start to fall. Very softly at first, like a whisper, barely noticeable in the least. Then came the puffs of it, floating down like flower petals, all gently swirling together like a painting. It was beautiful, I'll admit this to myself. My eyes were heavy with the sleepiness that comes from cold, and the shivers that threatened to come over me again and again seemed to change their minds and just let me be.

So many mistakes in my life…So many. I had chosen to live a mistake, to live by what I knew, just to torture myself. What else was there really? Now that I was done, I knew nothing else. I didn't want to stay there, but I could never go back either. That left only the forest for me to make a home of.

It would be short lived however, I knew this. Maybe another hour or so, and I would be faded like all of this white snow, another frozen piece of winter. How far had I walked, where was I? Hopefully a child would find me, get their first taste of what life was. I almost smiled, but it stopped before it met my eyes. I didn't wish myself upon anyone.

**oOoOoOo**

**A/N:** There we are. Maybe another chapter or two will be added to his. Please review me and tell me what you think. If people actually want more, I'll post the rest.


	2. Naruto's Sunset

**A/N:** So this story has a mix of past and present going on, and it's difficult for me to create long-ish chapters, so spare me. I'd really like to get this story going, but if there's not a lot of reviews I'll just sort of let it be I suppose. Chapters will switch between Naruto's point of view and Sasuke's.

**oOoOoOo**

The glow was all that was left from the sunset I had been watching. Konoha looked so peaceful in the dusk, bathed in the last light from the day and covered in snow. The place looked like nothing ill could ever come to it, like this right here was how things were and always would be. It made my throat clench slightly to think of the things that could have been, could have happened. The seal on my stomach tingled slightly, reminding me the evil I held within me. It seemed sometimes that there were things that just never left you, no matter how much you wished it.

All day I had been edgy, I couldn't sit still, not even in this moment of quiet. I gripped my pants, balling the fabric in my fists as I tried to understand where the anxiety was even coming from. Freezing, and tired of the same view, I turned from my balcony rail and slid my door open. With one last glance at the now dull sky, I slipped inside. The warmth seeped into my bones immediately, and it should have felt nice, but the feeling made my skin crawl.

I scratched my head, leaning my elbows on my kitchen counter, my eyes tracing the cracks in my wall. I really should fix that. I remember where it was from too, not a memory I liked to think about.

"_Dammit Sasuke I already told you!" _

_My fist slammed into the wall and I felt it crack beneath my now bruised hand. I yanked it away and cradled it to my chest, not caring if it was broken or not._

"…_Naruto."_

_Not a question, not a plea, a statement. I close my eyes for a moment and when I open them again, you're gone. Good. Stay away._

A sigh escaped my lips and I ran my hands tiredly through my hair. What was I going to do? No matter what I did you wouldn't stay away. And sometimes your eyes…I didn't know what I saw in them, but it scared me. You kept sneaking in here, and everytime I knew it was risking too much. You would get caught. And what right did you have coming in the first place?

My throat felt dry so I pulled open the fridge and poured a glass of milk. I smelled it and eyed it suspiciously for a moment before deciding to drink it anyway. The glass made a clanking noise as I set it in the sink. My arm had goosebumps even though my skin had warmed from the cold by now. Why was I thinking about this? Why was I worrying?

_His face was lit up by the moon, and I could just make out his eyes, staring straight at me, looking too deep._

"_You know it's too late. Why do you keep coming here?"_

_My words sound horribly dull and faded to my own ears, and I move my gaze from his face to the floorboards._

"_You're right. You won't see me again Uzumaki."_

_I couldn't place why it hurt for him not to use my name, or the fear I felt knowing his words were true. He had left a long time ago, and some things could just never get put back together. It didn't matter how much you wanted it._

I shook my head, shaking off the memory of last night. Something about the whole thing was just wrong, but no matter what I did, I could never understand what. My heart shouldn't feel this empty if nothing had even filled it in the first place. There was nothing missing that I'd had before. I'd always been empty. So why wasn't this leaving me be?

**oOoOoOo**

Cradled in the snow at the trunk of a tree he lay, face as still and impassive as it had been through most of his life. You would hardly notice anything out of place except for the barely quivering breathes leaving the heaving chest. It felt sort of a waste to die when you knew no one would come for you.

**oOoOoOo**

**One Year Ago…**

"Sasuke, seriously, we've been walking for hours. Can we please just rest for like half a minute?"

I swear I thought my legs were going to fall off. If being given missions so far out of the village was an honor, I failed to see how. Especially when your companion hardly spoke a word except to insult you. This was hardly the kind of adventure I was looking for. All we had been doing was scouting this area for intruders, and as of yet, nothing. Just another paranoid mission that Konoha insisted upon but was completely not necessary.

I flopped on the ground, refusing to budge. Sasuke could go on without me for all I cared. And there he goes now…Hey!

"Ugh…wait up!"

I was never going to feel my legs again. Just because I chose to follow didn't mean I was going to come quietly.

"Gah, Sasuke, I know you're like sworn to silence or something lately, but can we please just take a break?? Make camp, get some food, head out in the morning?"

I scrunched my face up to look as pathetic and hungry as I possibly could, sticking my bottom lip out for good measure. I knew it was hopeless and he'd only stop when he was good and ready, but I had to try, didn't I?

He halted, sparing a glance over his shoulder to get a good look me. He sighed and turned, as if he had decided I was worthy of facing him. Just one of his many charms…Not. Why is he arching his eyebrow like that at me?

"Why are you rolling your eyes idiot?"

Oh, that was why.

"Blah, just nevermind, can we get some food or what?"

Setting up camp was quick. I mean all we had to do was roll out our beds and start a fire, which of course I left to Sasuke while I dug in my pack for what was left of our meager meals. And I mean _meager. _I glared sullenly at my half eaten bread, which was crusty, and dug deeper only to find some dried plums. Oh yum, a meal and the shits in one, how delightful. With a quick glance at Sasuke to make sure he was busy with the fire, I dug in his pack and found a bag of assorted things that looked something like trail mix and switched it with my plums. This was what being a ninja was all about, if you could trick your closest friends, enemies were easy.

"Naruto, if you do not put my food back in my pack I'm going to shave your head in your sleep."

He hadn't even turned from the fire! How did he know?? I fumbled and quickly put them back, turning on him with a glare on my face.

"Tch, how dare you accuse me of stealing your food! You're scrawny enough as it is…"

I shuffled up to the fire and bit tragically on my crusty bread, eyeing him evilly as he removed his delicious bag of…Something better than what I was eating. I sat down and heaved a sigh, hoping he'd notice my pain. But of course, being himself, he just ate the entire bag without sparing me a glance.

The sun was setting behind the trees, casting the forest in a fading glow. The sun was always one of my favorite things, and if I had to pick anything that I'd want to be, that would be it. Not like I'd ever share that with anyone. I looked at Sasuke as he crumpled up the bag and put it back in his pack, shaking the hair out of his eyes absently. If I was the sun, then Sasuke was the moon. He just suited it. Not like the sun and the moon really had anything to do with each other anyways.

"If you sit there daydreaming like that you're going to be useless on watch."

I rolled my eyes and resisted the urge to stick my tongue out. Always so formal, so businesslike. I knew there was more underneath all of that, but I didn't know if anyone would ever be able to find it. He hid too well I think.

I lay down that night as content as one could achieve on a stupid useless mission and sticks digging into your back as you tried to get settled. Sasuke has first watch, and I was glad for it, because I was just way tired out. We'd been going at a grueling pace all day and I was happy for the rest…

The next time I opened my eyes it was to a hoarse yell and the distinct sound of kunai thudding into the ground.

**oOoOoOo**

**A/N: **So there we have it. Please review and we can really get this story going. That is, if anyone actually reads it. Hah.


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